Interview With Muammar Ghadafi

Oscar: Todays we have an interview with Moa…mya…that Ghadaffi guy.

MacIntosh: Yep. We tracked him down and he agreed to give us a world-wide exclusive interview. We found him working at the Lazy Lizard Lounge in Las Vegas Nevada.

Oscar: Where moa…mya…that guy… has been performing three shows a day doin’ Michael Jackson impressions.

In the Green Room at the Lazy Lizard Lounge

MacIntosh: Welcome Muammar Ghadafi. May I call you Muammar?

MG: I prefer my formal name.

Oscar: You gots a formal name?

MG: Yes. I am ‘Brotherly Leader and Guide of the Revolution in Libya’.

Oscar: You gots anything a little shorter.

MacIntosh: How about ‘bro’.

MG: Yes. Bro would be acceptable.

Oscar: Well Bro….first thing I gotta say we caught your act and it was amazing.

MG: Yes. Micheal would be very proud.

MacIntosh: Did you know Micheal Jackson?

MG: Yes. We know each other very fabulous. We share the same tailor and I was a Brotherly Guide to his dressing tastes.

MacIntosh: Did you come up with the glove idea?

MG: We were playing golf one day…he admired my glove…one thing lead to another. Very fabulous.

Oscar: Wow Bro. Micheal Jackson played golf?

MG: Big golfer. Very fabulous to play golf with Micheal Jackson. Some day I tell you about the Tripoli Open when he moonwalked into a sand trap. Very fabulous.

MacIntosh: Do you know other famous people?

Let The Ass Kissing Begin

MG: Well….I think I met your Senators Joe Leiberman and John McCain.

MacIntosh: You’re not sure you met them?

MG: Not sure because I never saw their faces…they were too busy kissing my ass.

Oscar: Thats funny Bro.

MG: Yes…and true.

MacIntosh: How did you get to America?

MG: United flight to Los Angeles and Southwest Airlines into Vegas.

Oscar: But howse come they lets you in at all?

MG: The whole thing was arranged by George Bush and his boy Dick Cheney.

MacIntosh: I think you have that backwards.

Oscar: Why would theys do that?

MG: You kidding? They owe the Bro big favors.

Oscar: Fors what?

MG: Because their CIA are nincompoops. Waterboarding…sheesh…big waste of water.

Oscar: So did you helps the CIA?

MG. Sure. They would send them down to Tripoli where we had true intelligence professionals.

Oscar: Did your guys get them to talk turkey?

MG: My guys could get them to talk kangaroo. We put the ‘extraordinary’ in ‘extraordinary rendition’.

MacIntosh: Did they come up with any important information?

MG: Don’t know. Don’t care.

MacIntosh: Turning to Libya. Syria is broadcasting phone messages where you call the rebels rats and germs to be eradicated.

Oscar: Whats that about?

MG: Hah hah. Just practising commercials for new business.

MacIntosh: You have a new business?

MG: Yes. Pest control…Its my first step into American poltics.

Oscar: Howse does pest controls get you into politics?

MG: Don’t know….just taking advice from Tom Delay.

MacIntosh: Do you know Tom Delay.

MG: Not sure. Never saw his face.

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