Oscar: Howse come them teabaggers love mean talk so much?
MacIntosh: Why are they defending their use of violent rhetoric?
Oscar: Yeah, howse come?
MacIntosh: Walter Mitty combined with penis envy.
MacIntosh: James Thurber wrote a short story about a guy named Walter Mitty. He’s a ordinary, meek guy in real life so he invents scenes where he is a brave hero.
Oscar: I thought they called them ‘chicken hawks’.
MacIntosh: Same thing. The most dangerous thing teabaggers ever did was show up late to a Kiwanis luncheon but they have an inner Rambo itching to play out.
Oscar: And itching can hurt huh MacIntosh.
MacIntosh: Yep. So they get all locked and loaded in their mobility scooter and cruise over to the teabagger meeting going “ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa” pretending they are picking off tree hugging liberals along the way.
Oscar: Are they flyin’ their colors?
MacIntosh: Oh yeah…they got leather jackets just like Sarah Palin with lettering that says ‘Born to be Mild’.
Oscar: That’s scary. What do they do at the teabagger meeting.
MacIntosh: They listen to speeches about the tree of liberty needing to be fed with the blood of patriots and if they can’t win with ballots they should use bullets instead.
Oscar: Yikes. What do they do after the meeting?
MacIntosh: They stop at A&W for a root beer
Oscar: That’s it?
Oscar: That’s why they like violent rhetoric so much?
MacIntosh: It’s all they got. Even an A&W root beer can get boring after awhile.
Oscar: Is that why they buy rifles?
MacIntosh: Yep. They like to sit in their power assisted Barca loungers and pretend they are snipers at the Democratic National Convention
Oscar: Do they go “ta-pocketa-pocketa-pocketa?”
MacIntosh: Yep. Then they yell out “how do you feel Nancy Pelosi now that you’ve met a real man with a real gun?”
Oscar: That’s why they own rifles?
MacIntosh: Yep. They need at least one thing that is long and hard.